Happily Ever After

As little girls playing with our dolls, my sister and I usually got to the part where the prince and princess get married, and then we ended the story.  Just like the movies – Cinderella, Beauty and the Beast, Sleeping Beauty, Snow White, Robin Hood, even The Swan Princess – we got to happily ever after, and that was it.  We tried once or twice, but we didn’t think we knew what came next.

Of course, we knew that kids came next, because we saw enough young married couples around us, but we knew (or thought we knew) all about kids growing up (being a pair of them ourselves) and that wasn’t interesting enough to tell a story about.  At least, not in comparison with the part where two people met and fell in love.  Our heros and heroines were quite as talented and good as we could imagine, and sometimes they rescued each other or something, and sometimes they just met at church, which was plenty realistic, but we would get to the part where our two main characters married, and that was usually the end of it.

In a story where more than one marriage was involved, sometimes one couple got married early on, and then we had a hard time figuring out what to have them do except have a couple of kids.  Which sometimes seemed awkward, but it was all we knew.  Was that really all there was to happily ever after?

Fast forward fifteen years.  A few weeks ago, I reached the quarter century mark, and I’ve embarked on my “happily ever after” with Sir K.  So what really happens when the wedding bells stop ringing and the honeymoon is over?  Why do all the stories stop at the wedding?  One obvious reason is that the newlywed couple wants some privacy, but besides that, isn’t it boring until the next cycle of romance begins?

I can tell you this, my happily ever after is not boring!  Granted, I might still be treading clouds rather than terra firma, but I’m living a very real life.  I went back to work a week after the wedding, and so did Sir K.  There was dinner to get on the table, laundry and shopping, church activities and such.  We didn’t stop being ourselves just because we married each other.  We just had a new set of priorities.

That set of priorities has meant that I left my job to be a full time homemaker.  It has meant that Sir K has had to reevaluate some of his commitments.  We are in the process of building a new life together out of the things we were doing as single people plus perhaps some new things that we could only do together.

Happily ever after does not mean sitting around staring into each other’s eyes, although we certainly do that when the occasion arises.  Happily ever after means living with the person you love, doing things you love with or for them, and knowing that no matter how bad it seems elsewhere, there’s a home to come to and a spouse there who cares deeply about what affects you.  And we definitely have that in each other.

As children we didn’t really understand all that, which is perfectly all right.  A five or ten year old only knows that she wants to grow up to be like mommy and mommy got married, so that must be what she wants to do.   Children watch movies, read stories, and gather that happily ever after follows the wedding bells.  And then they have to figure out how to find their own Happily Ever After…

Advertisements
Explore posts in the same categories: Growing Up, Young Adulthood

Tags: , , , ,

You can comment below, or link to this permanent URL from your own site.

I like comments as much as the next blogger, so leave me some feedback!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s


%d bloggers like this: